Thabo, 17 years old, witnessed the death of his father during a violent robbery. Since that time he has been unable to sleep, has nightmares, feels very sad most of the time, has been fighting with his friends and cannot stop thinking about the event. He blames himself and in his head he goes over and over what he could have done to prevent his father's death. Thabo is experiencing what can be called a post (after) traumatic response.
Thabo's reactions are common in people who have been in dangerous situations in which they have been powerless. These sorts of situations generally involve seeing violence or being a victim of violence, although any dangerous situation can cause such a reaction. Examples include violent crime, assault, threats, car accidents, being in war situations, rape and political violence.
When in situations like these people often feel like they cannot cope. Others say that during the event they felt numb, like they were frozen. After the event people experience reactions that affect their behaviour and emotions.
Feelings of confusion, headaches, vomiting, feeling cold, being without feelings and shaking are common. In most cases people cannot sleep after the incident and have nightmares. Feelings of suddenly being back in the situation and not being able to stop thinking about it are common. Being scared all the time, worried and unable to relax is typical. Some may talk about the event all the time and others may try to keep it to themselves. Feeling depressed, sad, crying all the time and not wanting to do your normal activities can also happen. Everyone feels guilty and most people blame themselves for what happened.
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The life-style of the person can change. Often people find that they lose their tempers easily, close relationships are difficult and many people feel very angry. At work most people find it hard to concentrate and seem to forget things. In the long-term, and in extreme cases, some people get self-destructive (i.e. purposefully hurt themselves), many people start drinking a lot of alcohol or taking drugs and other people even want to kill themselves.
When all of these feelings start happening most people feel that they are going crazy and will be unable to cope anymore. However, it is important to know that to experience these feelings is normal and natural. People often have these types of responses to trauma. People who have these responses are not sick or weak. They will usually get strong and feel well again if they get support from their families, community members (e.g. priests) and people who are trained to help with these sorts of problems like trauma counsellors and psychologists.
If you have been exposed to violence do not be afraid to seek help. Speak to those you trust and share your experiences. Services are also available, phone Sophie or Mpho at the Trauma Clinic (Tel: 011 403-5102) for more information or if you would like to speak to someone about your difficulties.
Published by Brandon Hamber & Mercy Hlungwani on 14 June 1997 for Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation, South Africa.
Brandon Hamber is a clinical psychologist.
Mercy Hlungwani is a psychiatric nurse.
